SOME ANNOUNCEMENTS

My second collection, The Glimmering Room, is forthcoming from Four Way Books in October of 2012.

I will be teaching this summer at The Frost Conference on Poetry and Teaching from
June 24 - 28, 2012. Here is a link for that:

http://www.frostplace.org/html/conference-teaching.html

I am teaching a poetry workshop from my home beginning Saturday March 10. If you are interested in joining us email me at cindyskylar@yahoo.com

Big Picture, Little Picture

As we've previously talked about, I am totally one of those people that takes an idea and runs with it. I am a total dreamer and visionary. I tend to overlook some of the day to day details because I am dreaming up a huge project, or a vacation, or planning an event. There are definite benefits to being always focused on the big picture. I try to take the little things in stride and not let small things bother me (note I said try). I am always looking ahead which means I am setting goals and hopefully following through with them. There are of course many downfalls as well. I tend to get so focused on things that are months away that I can become very overwhelmed. Occasionally it takes a giant reminder from the Lord to slow down. Like, for example, my back locking on me. I am on day five of extreme pain and limited mobility. I don't know if its because of the fibromyalgia or what but it happens about every month or two. This time I had both kids with me at the studio with a group of toddlers. Fortunately I had another teacher there who has watched the kids before. She was available to help take me to the chiropractor and watch the kids at home. It was incredibly frustrating to be stuck at home and not able to do anything. I had someone helping with the kids and it would've been the perfect time to do laundry, clean, clean out paperwork, do anything at all. Instead I was forced to just stand (sitting and laying hurt too much). The kids cry and don't understand why I can't pick them up or why they can't jump on me. Jason has to do double the duty and I feel like I am putting everyone out. Its very frustrating. It also forces me to rest, physically. I try to rest mentally but my wheels just keep turning. Each time my back locks I just remind myself its like a forced time out. As if God is like, ok, you're over doing it you need to just stop and be still for awhile and quit focusing on all of the big things. It reminded me of a story that occurred when we were in Denver for Remembering The Brave in September. We took the kids to the Zoo, which was amazing. The kids absolutely loved it. Towards the end of our visit there, we approached the elephants. The children were finishing up the popcorn we had bought them and were accidentally spilling it on the ground. 
They were fighting over the drinks and so focused on the snacks they didn't even notice the giant elephants coming right over to us. A couple of little birds hopped along the ground searching for popcorn pieces and the kids were fascinated. Cruz and Wren chased the little birds all around seemingly unaware of the enormous animals looming close by.
 We kept telling them to look up but they were in their own little worlds.

 Wren kept throwing pieces of popcorn trying to lure the little birds.
After like fifteen minutes of persuasion they finally caught glimpses of the elephants. That evening we attended the Remembering The Brave Ceremony to honor the fallen. We sat at a table with two amazing families who's sons had both paid the ultimate sacrifice. As I told them of the experiences that day I shared how silly it was that they were so caught up in the little tiny seemingly insignificant things that they were missing the big picture. One of the mom's flipped the scenario around for me. "I think its nice, some people are so caught up in the big picture that they don't stop to enjoy the small things." It stopped me instantly. It's very true. So, here I sit at the computer with my back locked up not able to move my head side to side being forced to just sit with the kids and not try to accomplish anything. Actually, in all honesty I did try to do some laundry this morning. It took me about three times as long and I think I've actually made my back much worse. Sometimes it is so hard to force yourself to slow down. Once again, I'm learning lessons from my kids whether I want to or not.

Ecuador's Health Minister: 'Ex-Gay' clinics are "shocking evidence of the prejudices we hold as a society"


In January I wrote about lesbian rights advocate Carina Vance being named to the Rafael Correa's presidential cabinet in Ecuador as the country's Health Minister.

The stunning news coincided with news that the government was finally taking action in shutting down clinics that were promoting treatments to "cure" homosexuality.  Efforts to raise awareness about these clinics were led by Fundación Causana, which Vance used to lead, and were the basis of online campaigns from Change.org and AllOut.org.

Both organizations celebrated victory based upon the news and members of Fundación Causana sent a photo thanking AllOut.org and their followers for making a difference.

The news quickly traveled around the world with the Associated Press and CNN running initial reports. But it was weeks later that The Christian Science Monitor published the most comprehensive report on Vance's appointment and the existence of these clinics ("Ecuador clinics said to 'cure' homosexuality stir debate", Feb. 10, 2012).

The article revealed that not everything had been settled between LGBT-rights advocates and the government. Advocates still claim the government is willfully hiding information about the clinics and has demanded more action while the government argues that they are still in the process of gathering information and will eventually take action.  Advocates also say that of 226 clinics, only 23 were shut down and they allege that most of them have reopened.  From the article:
The government last year publicized the closing of 30 centers, though gay rights groups say it was only 23. The clinics were all shut down because of minor infractions, such as expired medicines, lack of fire exits, and lack of hygiene. Some did not even have a valid license. Most opened up again after a few days.

Gay rights organizations say the government is not doing enough to investigate crimes and close illegal operators for good. However, Carina Vance, a prominent gay rights activist who was appointed Ecuador's minister of public health last month, says the government is committed to a long-term strategy to change the clinics.

“It is a complex and urgent issue that needs a comprehensive intervention,” says Ms. Vance.
When Vance was appointed to the Health Ministry in January, she was taking over an office that seemed to be in disarray and was charged with restructuring the country's health system to make it more effective.  By all accounts, she has hit the ground running and has had little time to sleep.

Although local media have barely covered the situation with the clinics, Ms. Vance has made several statements to international media on the issue and has promised to address the situation.  And last week, on February 17th, the Health Ministry released a 10-minute video in which she addresses the issue head on.  It's short on specifics but indicates there is commitment.

Below is the full clip (turn 'annotations' on to read my on-screen translation). Full English language transcript below the fold.


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    Public Health Ministry Interview: Ms. Carina Vance, Public Health Minister
    Released February 17, 2012

    Q: What is the Public Health Ministry's take on claims there have been human rights violations at rehabilitation centers?

    Vance: First of all we have to agree that the State must guarantee the rights of the people and, in the five years since Rafael Correa became the president, there have been greater efforts to strengthen the capacity of the State to guarantee those human rights. There is still a lot of work to do and the situation at the rehabilitation clinics - about which we have received serious allegations about human rights violations - puts into evidence all the work that still needs to get done.

    From the vantage point of the Public Health Ministry - and as the Health Minister - I am clear on this and we have some strategies to strengthen the Ministry's response regarding this situation.

    Q: What is the Public Health Ministry doing about the situation?

    Vance: As a matter of fact we are elaborating a judicial strategy from the perspective of the State's obligation to guarantee human rights. And that means there are some legal instruments that need to be reformed. There are current regulations that define the way these establishments should be managed and our proposal is to link them to the constitutional mandate - the new Ecuadorean constitution of 2008 - that guarantees human rights for all. It's not only about a lack of government oversight.

    Why is this an issue? Because in this society we have situations in which individuals enter [these clinics] due to alcoholism or drug addiction, but also those who behave in ways that do not match the existing social norms. For example, a young man with long hair or a person who dresses in a manner that is different to what his parents deem appropriate may end up in these centers for an intervention - supposedly to change their behavior. Instead, we see a clear violation of human rights - and the complaints say just as much.

    At the moment, we are analyzing the regulations and the tools that exist in order to bring them in line with the mandate established by the constitutional reforms and by the government's policy that, in effect, is to defend and guarantee human rights for all.

    Q: Regarding allegations of homophobic attitudes among political appointees.

    Vance: Well, as Public Health Minister and from personal experience as a lesbian woman, I'd say there are issues related to discrimination that include homophobia, transphobia, racism and the like, not only in the public sector and in government but also in society. It's a challenge that has to be confronted not only through the controls and policies of the State as the body that guarantees these rights, but there also have to be efforts made by our society. And that's where the work of the Public Health Ministry becomes fundamental because in order to improve public health you have to work with the public. You have to work on strengthening the participation of the civil population in the actions taken by the government. But, as I said, there will be public servants and government representatives who will hold prejudices against certain individuals when we come from a society that holds prejudices against those individuals... a society where homophobia does exist.

    People who belong to the LGBT community often have to endure these type of situations in their normal day to day lives. Those who end up at the rehabilitation clinics - and what we have seen in the majority of these cases - is that they have been brought there by their own families. We have to work with those families. We have to work with the roots of the cause. And I'm not providing a justification that gives government a pass on its responsibilities. It has to be both. If we don't tackle both issues we won't get a sustainable response. It has to go hand in hand: An effort to educate and break up the myths and prejudices that exist in this society and, at the same time, a government-led response with the understanding that the State is the one that guarantees the human rights of all citizens.

    Q: How does the current constitution strengthen the rights of the LGBTI community?

    Vance: It is evident that changes made through the judicial framework can be incredibly important as long as they go hand in hand with other types of strategies. Remember: Homosexual acts between men were still legally penalized before the 1997 constitution was approved. And, specifically, it did say 'homosexuality between men'. When the constitution changed, it generated an opportunity to strengthen the work regarding civil society and the protection of the rights of the LGBTI community. It is evident that there was a change in norms and this has led to a certain rupture - thanks to the work of organizations from the civil sector - a rupture that made it possible for the civil sector to strengthen their work on these issues.

    Similarly, I believe the 2008 constitution has to be one of the strongest constitutions on these rights... in guaranteeing human rights, people's rights, it also establishes a rupture. But on the legal side, preventing it from becoming just a piece of paper requires a lot of work not only from the government - which must follow the constitutional mandates - but also from the civil society which has the more complex task of changing the mental schemes that we have as a society which are discriminatory in many different ways.

    Q: What is your opinion on treatments that offer a cure to homosexuality?

    Vance: The concept of "curing" homosexuality is evidently based I believe on the concept of fearing diversity. And it has been decades since the World Health Organization as well as other entities related to health have determined that homosexuality is not an illness and does not have a cure. What we need to cure are indeed those prejudices that still exist in society. That's the way it is written in the constitution of this country and it's difficult work that we need to do on a daily basis. But I believe we have made great strides.

    Q: What would you tell a person who has been a victim of these treatments?

    Vance: That we are conscious of the urgency needed in our response to this situation. And I would say that the existence of these clinics that perform these type of treatments is one of the most visible and shocking evidences of the prejudices we hold as a society. I believe that the discrimination and these prejudices are still present in day to day life and requires work from the government in taking responsibility of the actions and controls that should be taken.

    But I would also say that it requires breaking the silence and that this requires sacrifice. I believe that without this, without breaking that silence, without denouncing these type of situations - with the sacrifice it demands, which I know is very, very difficult in some instances - without doing this we won't achieve change. And I believe that just like our constitution establishes a rupture, similarly we would have to establish ruptures and one of those ruptures is to break the silence.

    And from the Health Ministry we are seeing a strategy, an integral strategy, which can protect those who denounce these situations. And it's not out of the generosity of the government, it's the responsibility of the government but it requires a well thought out plan exactly because we have to protect the people who are in these type of situations

    About.com names Blabbeando as a "2012 Best Gay Blog" Nominee!

    The good people at About.com have just announced the nominees for their "2012 About.com Gay Life Readers' Choice Awards" and I am delighted to say that Blabbeando is up for the "Best Gay Blog" award (vote here).

    Blabbeando is up against some of the best blogs out there including Rod2.0, JoeMyGod, Towleroad and Kenneth in the (212) and I feel honored to be in such company.

    There are also a number of other categories including "Best Gay News Site" and "Favorite LGBT Celebrity".

    For a full listing of categories, click here.

    It's the first time that About.com's Gay Life is running the Reader's Choice Awards.  We thank Ramon Johnson and the readers of About.com for the consideration.

    The Glimmering Room


    My second collection, The Glimmering Room, is forthcoming from Four Way Books this October. When the book becomes available, I will provide links.

    Swapping out the Good for the Better

    Yeah, I know it's been forever since I posted here.  You can send me some strongly worded comments if you'd like, about my complete lack of blogging consistency and how I shouldn't be such a doofus about posting here.  Go ahead.  I'll wait.

    *hums the Jeopardy theme song*

    Finished?  Okay, now on to the real reason I posted this.  Because I want to hear with the rest of you think about something other than my #blogfail.

    A few Sundays ago at church, the discussion turned to how sometimes we might not have to choose between good and bad, but good and another good.  And how sometimes we may need to choose the better good over another good.  And how one person's decision may be right for them, but completely wrong for someone else.

    Then we were asked to contemplate the idea of finding one good thing in our lives that we could maybe swap out for a better good.

    I feel like I have been doing a lot of this in my personal life lately.  For example, I used to have an agent (the good) and a book on submission (another good), but I made the hard decision to set my writing career aside temporarily and part with my agent in order to spend more time focusing on my health and my family (the better good).  Two weeks and three days ago--not that I'm keeping track or anything--I decided to set aside sugary sweets (ooh, that stuff is GOOOD) for something better (a healthier lifestyle).

    But I've been thinking about how this could apply to the writing life, too.  And now that I've picked up the pen again, so to speak, I realized that I need to swap out the good for the better in this part of my life, too.

    I still haven't figured out what good I need to replace with a better.  I'm hoping it will come to me soon.  It may have to wait until after I get over my current sugar withdrawal, though, but I'm already feeling a little less jittery and a little more zen-like.  So that's good...er, better. 

    While I wait, though, I'd love to be inspired by stories from the rest of you.  Do you have a good you've replaced with a better in your writing?  It could be something as simple as replacing a good character with a better one, or something more cosmic like swapping out a good writing habit for a better one.  Or is there a better you've been thinking about introducing into your writing life?  Please share it all with me!












    Chile: "We are all women, we are all different, we are all equal, we are all transsexual"


    I have already introduced you to some great transgender rights spots that have been produced recently in Argentina.

    Now comes this brand new ad produced by the Transsexual Organization for the Dignity of Diversity and funded by the Chilean government with the theme of equality for transgender women.

    Very much like this groundbreaking ad, I love the fact that, image-wise, the vibe is a positive one and not a gloomy one. The one reservation I have about it is that while one of the persons in the ad says that she does not want to be treated as if she has an illness, another woman calls being transgender a "condition".  It probably stems from transgender women being told all their lives that their identity is a condition, specially in countries where you have to get diagnosed as such before being allowed gender-reassignment surgery.

    Here is the full ad. Turn 'annotations' on for my on-screen translation:

    Dalaga si Misis, Binata si Mister (1981)









    Dalaga si Misis, Binata si Mister (Lino Brocka, 1981)
    English Translation: The Wife's a Bachelorette, the Husband's a Bachelor'

    Doria (Nora Aunor) is a professional singer. Dick (Christopher de Leon) is an advertising executive. Although married for closing to three years, they have agreed to have a liberated union, giving Doria the time to concentrate on her career and Dick the leeway to play around. The arrangement seems fine until their third year anniversary when Dick gets caught up with flirtatious go-go dancers, leaving Doria alone all night, waiting for her husband on what she thought was a very special night for them. That night’s heated argument forces Doria to leave Dick, leading to the comedic events and encounters that comprise much of what makes Lino Brocka’s Dalaga si Misis, Binata si Mister such an entertaining film.

    The success of Dalaga si Misis, Binata si Mister is more a product of the witty writing and the endearing performances. Brocka’s direction, while still predictably dependable, is more perfunctory than anything. Scenes are dutifully sequenced and serviceably framed. Humor is obviously not Brocka’s cup of tea, forcing him to delegate most of the comedy to the humorous dialogue written by screenwriter Butch Dalisay and deliciously delivered by Brocka’s reliable stable of actors and actresses.

    Aunor gamely plays the spitfire wife who can no longer take her husband’s infidelities. De Leon, on the other hand, expertly clowns around, allowing himself to be ridiculed as the careless playboy whose immaturity has him trapped in an illicit relationship with a sixteen year old aspiring commercial model that goes out of hand. Carmi Martin, who plays De Leon’s sixteen year old lover, mixes sexy and naive, alluring and annoying, and becomes the one character that makes De Leon’s side of the story the more interesting one in the film. Supporting Martin is Bert Olivar, who plays Martin’s perpetually drunk and extorting father with immaculate gusto. Joel Alano, who plays Aunor’s lover, an up and coming singer in Aunor’s show, is tame, colorless, and perhaps the only character who does not add anything to the film, driving Aunor’s featured escapades with him in the sidelines.

    Brocka may have a chance to explore the intricacies of marital discord in a Philippine setting that is more and more moving towards the conservatism that marriage represents. However, Dalaga si Misis, Binata si Mister settles to be just a display of the hilarious consequences brought about by a relationship that was not serious right from the start. While it is interesting to see Brocka strip himself of the heavy burdens of society and just have fun in the film, one can easily judge the film with all of its missed opportunities of stretching the material further to be a satirical reflection of the hypocrisies of the supposed modern Filipino marriage rather than just an admittedly engrossing series of funny scenarios involving ex-lovers and their respective paramours are just too much to be left ignored. Perhaps the real burden of Brocka is not his need to lace his art with social relevance but that he has become too associated with social relevance that all his films will be judged as to how much they shake society to its very core.

    That said, Dalaga si Misis, Binata si Mister is not a Brocka film in the same vein as Tinimbang Ka Ngunit Kulang (You were Weighed but Found Wanting, 1974), Insiang (1976) and Maynila: sa mga Kuko ng Liwanag (Manila in the Claws of Neon, 1975). It is more a showcase of the director’s competence, of his ability to stretch his reach beyond the comfort and crutches of social relevance. It is guiltlessly enjoyable. From the opening song sung exquisitely sung by Aunor to the stupendous finale involving Aunor, De Leon, Martin and Olivar in a word war, the film was clearly crafted not to arouse thinking but to fascinate and titillate. Brocka’s clever use of star power (Aunor’s role as a singer allows her to belt out a couple of Rey Valera tunes), of Aunor and De Leon’s then indefatigable love team, of Dalisay’s adept appreciation of what is funny in what is real, are all blended together into one product that is so satisfying, one can just immediately forget about all the seriousness in the world and get drowned in laughter.

    (Cross-published in Lagarista.)

    Sinking


    I have always loved the colors in my bathroom. This is a little study for a larger painting I hope to start soon.

    Housewarming

    Valentine's Day

    For the last coupe of months I have been diligently working on personalized Valentine’s for close friends and family members. Each year I bring out collected magazines, photographs, tea bags, and paper and begin cutting, pasting, painting, and writing. I finished over 40 cards this year just in time for my Feb. 14th deadline.

    Unofficially Yours (2012)






    Unofficially Yours (Cathy Garcia-Molina, 2012)

    Perhaps the primary motivation for Cathy Garcia-Molina’s Unofficially Yours is to craft a love story that has graduated from the conservative romances that the Catholic Church would give their blessings to. Not all love stories happily end with the first kiss. Some actually begin (and sometimes abruptly end) with a night of steamy intoxicated sexual intercourse. Garcia-Molina fluently communicates that motivation for the most part. She has her characters copulating without the blessings of an official relationship. Their coffee breaks hardly involve caffeine, just intense amounts of lust and sexual attraction. In a way, Garcia-Molina has successfully created celluloid-bound lovers who not only have romantic hearts but also working hormone-producing gonads.

    Unfortunately, the demands of marketability prevents the film from truly being about men and women whose romantic escapades have been paved through one night stands and no-strings-attached agreements. Unofficially Yours eventually succumbs to formula. Explanations are snatched from thin air, rationalizing the behavior of the lovers, making it seem that traumatic past relationships are needed to develop a healthy hunger for sex. Of course, these explanations are there to lead towards the inevitable conclusion of the lovers establishing the so-called norm, abandoning whatever curious arrangement that had kept their libidos sufficiently satisfied for months.

    Surely, Unofficially Yours is hardly successful in initiating something new within the stagnant supply of romantic comedies from the mainstream studios. The film is still in the vein of all the romances that came before it, whether those romances involved virginal teenyboppers or problematic yuppies. The core message about love and the contagious giddy feeling one gets from relating to that love remain the same. The only difference is that Unofficially Yours is sprinkled with more sex scenes.

    The innovation of the entire rom-com formula however is not the point of the film. It is charm and the guiltless enjoyment one derives from that manufactured charm. Truth be told, Garcia-Molina gives that formula and the movie studio that swears by that formula the credibility they desperately need. She crafts these escapist gems by making most of those silly things called love teams, unmindful of any pretense or artistic ambition, removing at least partially the bad taste of falling completely for a film whose only real value is just to entertain.

    Unofficially Yours is just immensely entertaining. Mackie (John Lloyd Cruz) is a dentist-turned-journalist who had a very memorable one-night stand with a very beautiful woman in Bali. That very beautiful woman turns out to be Ces (Angel Locsin), his mentor in his new job as a journalist. They resume their sexual trysts, with the agreement that there are absolutely no strings attached and that they are forbidden to fall in love with each other. Mackie however starts to fall for Ces, whose hardened exterior slowly but surely soften as Mackie starts wooing her with his genuine niceness.

    Garcia-Molina makes most of the resources she’s provided. Perhaps the biggest of these resources are her leads, Cruz and Locsin. From Close to You (2006) to Miss You Like Crazy (2010), Garcia-Molina has molded Cruz’s onscreen persona as the man most women want their boyfriends to be and most men want themselves to be. By utilizing Cruz’s less-than-perfect physique, evocative eyes, and considerable acting talent, she has created for Cruz a vulnerability that feels more genuine than anything else in the fantasies his characters thrive in. In Unofficially Yours, Cruz simply enunciates what makes him such a charming lead. Locsin, on the other hand, complements Cruz’s overt appeal by being less animated, more subtle.

    Garcia-Molina also taps into pop culture, creating a romance whose most fantastic elements are what make it irresistibly relatable. The characters sing pop songs to each other, revealing the unabashed sentimentality that these films thrive on. Garcia-Molina sufficiently understands that there is no point to withholding the goods that the films that she makes should peddle. She just dishes out everything, from the parade of quotable swoony lines to the gimmicks that are there purely for their pleasurable consequences, unhindered except by good taste. Garcia-Molina acknowledges the confines of her craft. She neither overreaches nor underachieves, creating a film that despite its lack of ambition and failure to push the envelope as advertised is more than forgivable for its many faults because the delights and charms it provides are too plenty and sometimes profound to ignore.

    (Cross-published in Twitch.)

    SUPERIOR!!!

    NATIONAL BOOK STORE IS AT IT AGAIN!!!

    They've had the Trese iPad then the ELMER iPad... But this one has gone the distance. Marvel's ICON imprint will release the latest book of Mark Millar and our very own Leinil Yu...  SUPERIOR! This time, there's a SUPERIOR iPad with LEINIL's ART!!! Can anyone top that??? :) Pretty super??? More like SUPER AWESOME!!!


    NBS sent me a picture of the iPad and by Odin's Beard does it look fantastic!!!


    I'll definitely buy a couple to get more raffle tickets!!!


    See the promo below :D




    Get the chance to win a one of a kind iPad with an original sketch by Leinil Yu!
    Get one (1) raffle coupon for every purchase of Superior from March 1 to 31, 2012 at all participating National Book Store and Powerbooks outlets.  If you reserve your copy up to February 29, 2012, you will get an extra raffle coupon that gives you a better chance of winning the one of a kind "Superior" iPad by Leinil Yu.  See posters for complete terms and conditions. Per DTI-NCR Permit No. 0761 Series of 2012.
    Superior is the newest smash super-hero comic book from Mark Millar (Kick-Ass, Wanted, Civil War) and Leinil Yu (Secret Invasion, The Uncanny X-men).  Simon Pooni had it all going for him - plenty of friends at school and good looks, and his coach called him one of the most talented basketball players he's ever seen. But that was when he could still move his legs. Now, he's living with multiple sclerosis, missing all the little things he used to take for granted, and escaping into the world of movies and comics with his best friend.  Then...SUPERIOR entered his life.

    Building their 'class nest"

    Another back dated post. *sigh*

    My boys already in their big school for a month plus, so far so good, they love their new school and they are looking forward to school everyday, not that they love to study, but they got a lot new friends to play with and they got tons of fun at school too!! *worried* Well, that will be in another post.

    On the first week of school, we selected the parent class rep, and for the first few weeks we are quite busy, beside than busy with the kids on the new environment, new school and new friends, we parent also have to get to know each other well, exchange e mail, phone numbers, know their kids and not forget we also get together to do the decoration at our kid's new "class nest" on the weekend.

    To my surprise, this school, like i mention here, they want we parent to involve in all the acitivity in school, one of it, we have to decorate the class ourself. The previous year students, they moved all their things away to their new classroom and for new standard one class , it will be totally empty except for the tables and chairs.


    On the first week weekend, all of us went to school for the "big task". I am glad that, most parent are really sporting, they give in their idea, volunteer to bring things to decorate and cleaning tools and detergent to wipe tables and chairs and windows.



    look at the parents, some are doing drawing, some are cleaning, some are wipping...
    at the back it is totally emtpy and we have to put up the reading card board.



    everyone working hard, except me clicking here and there. LOL!



    ok, must show that i am working hard too!! LOL!
    Sorry i have to blur out the parent's face without getting permission from them to post it here.


    the new cabinets for all the acitivities book & execise books and the new decorate board with all the reading posters.




    this is the reading corner. Yes, we even get the tables and chairs from ikea!!



    new curtain for the class, oh yes, we get someone to come and tailor made it. Cool ya?



    more deco and make it look more fun and interesting place to study.


    the notice board near the class entrance, draw and decorate by one of the mummy, i salute her art talent. I admit i cannot do such nice art work.


    Each class has their own class theme, we all agree we want to have "space" theme. One of the mummy did this very nice Rocket on the class entrance door! Pending is the children's photo in an astronauts helmet and we will paste it on the rocket and we are trying to look for some 3D planets stickers to stick it on the wall too.






    Tada, this is the highlight of the class, the cute rocket!


    This is just some update on my boys's new big school.

    Cuba promotes first gay-themed movie in seventeen years


    It has been more than seventeen years since "Fresa y Chocolate", a film by Tomás Gutierréz Alea and Juan Carlos Tabío, received an official launch from he Cuban Institute of Cinematographic Arts before going on to worldwide acclaim.

    It is the only gay-themed movie to have received that distinction... until now.

    Described as a psychological thriller, Enrique Pineda Barnet's "Verde Verde" ("Green Green") premiered at the Havana Film Festival in December and opened to the general public yesterday at a couple of theaters in Havana.

    The movie tells the story of a bisexual merchant marine doctor who engages in a game of seduction with a man who is deeply conflicted about his attraction to men.

    Tipping his hat to Rainer Werner Fassbder's "Querelle" both visually and thematically, Pineda Barnet says his new film is meant to be a strong condemnation of the homophobia that still exists in Cuban culture and an open challenge to the rigid concept of masculinity and the violence it sometimes engenders when challenged.

    "It's not a festive movie, it was made with love, with true love," the director said to AFP, "it is an attack against homophobia, which is an attack against love."

    The film already drew some controversy in Cuba for an early version of the movie poster which showed a bloody knife with a handle in the shape of a penis.  It's been since replaced by a different promotional poster.

    Also worth noting, the film premiere is being hosted by the "Different" Film Club which gathers a number of Cuban LGBT-rights advocates under the umbrella of the National Center for Sexual Education (CENESEX).

    The Center is led by Mariela Castro Espín, daughter of Cuban president Raúl Castro, and a leading LGBT-rights advocate.

    Related:

    The Condition of The Heart

    The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost. ~G.K. Chesterton




    In honor of Valentines Day it is only fitting for me to post something regarding hearts. It's not going to be the typical lovey dovey romantic story or even a sarcastically humorous venting session. One year ago today I was running ragged with two teeny tiny tots strapped to my hips losing my mind trying to keep up with them and the house and the dog and my job. Cruz had some valentine hearts that he became obsessed with. They were very special to him. The little tiny hearts with the comments barely written across the tops that make you sometimes ask, 'seriously? who wrote this? He would carry them everywhere. His little sweaty dirty hands would make those hearts just moist enough to collect pieces from anything it came in contact with. Any lint, hair, dust, you name it. It was disgusting. He would drop it on the floor and I would jump leap and fly through the air in dramatic fashion to try to pry it from him before he placed it right back into his mouth. At times I succeeded but many times I failed. Franklin would walk past him and the heart would just stick to his tail. Or even worse, Cruz would hold the heart out in his hand and let Franklin lick it! For those of you asking, 'where was the mother during this' just know I was close enough to see and close enough to yell stop but not close enough to catch it. All I could think of were the germs and the nasty texture that it must create when he put it back in his mouth. I kept asking him to give it to me, to trust me, to let me wash it off in the sink and that I'd give it back, or get him a new one. He had a very difficult time letting go. He wanted to trust me, he just really struggled with it. Each time I would rinse it, that little heart would get smaller and smaller. Each time Frank licked it it would get smaller. I would tell him, 'Cruz, be careful, your little heart is getting dirty. Let me take care of your heart so you don't drop it. Don't lose your heart'. Poor Frank, he didn't know. He had no bad intentions but a kid was letting him lick candy so of course he did. I would yell at Frank and to Cruz "Stop it, he's going to destroy your heart". The words resonated like a familiar song in my head. I said them all back again. I shared the story later that day with a group of high school girls, who inevitably saw the amazing correlation. So, I now pose the question to you. What is it that you are allowing to come in contact with your tiny precious little heart. Don't you value your unique one of a kind heart? What are things in your life that you are allowing to damage you. It may be an unhealthy relationship, it may be an addiction, it may be a group of friends, or bad television, it could be anything. On this Valentines Day, please take some time to evaluate the condition of your heart. Don't be careless with it, for from it springs the well of life. Don't allow others to take advantage of it, you only have one. Value it, treasure it, and share it with people when their heart is broken. And guard it with all your might.





    Ricky Martin's 'Ché' is is not the 'Ché' you think it is

    Speaking of Ricky Martin: Broadway previews of the new "Evita" begin on March 12th and Martin has been busy preparing for his role as 'Ché'.

    Back in November a Cuban exile group in Florida organized a protest against Martin calling him to task for glorifying the life of iconic Communist revolutionary leader Ché Guevara ("Cuban exile group stages hilarious protest against Ricky Martin").

    At the time I pointed out that the original concept of the Ché character in "Evita" was not based on Guevara and now we have confirmation.

    An excerpt from a Playbill article posted on February 10th:
    The narrating role of 'Ché' is reverted to the way it was written for the original concept album – as an 'everyman' of the lower/working class, serving as the voice of the people; not Che Guevara. Using Che Guevara as inspiration for the role was a choice made by Hal Prince when staging the original production.
    Sorry angry Cuban American right wing extremists from Florida. You lose again.

    Previously:

    Guest Post: Glee's awkward treatment of Latino stereotypes


    This article originally appeared on Univision News' Tumblr page and has been cross-posted at Blabbeando with permission. You can follow Univision News on Twitter at @UnivisionNews.

    Opinion: Ricky Martin overshadowed on ‘Glee’ by episode’s awkward treatment of Latino stereotypes

    By Miguel Tamayo

    That was weird. Very weird.

    I don’t really think of myself as an easily-offended person, nor am I particularly sensitive to Hollywood’s tendency to stereotype or over-generalize, but as I sat in front of my TV watching the latest episode of Glee, I couldn’t help but wonder what the hell the writers were doing. Was I supposed to be angry, proud, embarrassed, grateful — all of the above? By the end of the episode, the only emotion I felt was pure, unadulterated confusion.

    The premise was sound: A non-Spanish-speaking Spanish teacher (I said sound, not perfect) who is ignorant to all things Latino and relies on caricature-like representations of the culture to teach his students, is shown the error of his ways by his one Latina student (Naya Rivera’s Santana) and a new-in-town Chilean-American former tooth model (ok, “sound” is not the right word, but this is Glee we’re talking about). Yet, in what was its first true foray into the world of Latin music and culture (Santana’s homophobic abuelita made a brief appearance earlier in the season) the hit show was a bit off the mark.

    The episode opens with Mr. Schuester (Matthew Morrison) delivering a sombrero-ridden rendition of “La Cucaracha” to his class, followed by a voiceover in which the unilingual Spanish-teacher laments the fact that his students are no longer excited by his “Taco Tuesday” performance of the famous Mexican folk song, and asks: “How could I have become so out of touch?” The audience then learns that one of McKinley High’s professors has retired, freeing up a tenured position. Schuester realizes that he needs to learn more Spanish in order to prove that he deserves the coveted position, setting up his introduction to Ricky Martin’s character, David Martinez, the aforementioned tooth model. Martinez teaches Spanish night classes but has a hidden talent (spoiler alert): he can sing and dance. The rest of the episode treats viewers to various Spanish-language songs — some, authentic Latin numbers and others, translated versions of English-language songs — performed by the Glee Club.  And while the show’s creators undoubtedly intended to deliver a positive message, the packaging in which it came clumsily toed the line between satirical social commentary and questionable thoughtlessness.

    On the one hand, you had Sra. Stephanie, the middle-aged woman in Martinez’s class, explaining that the reason she was taking the course was to learn how to say “‘Stop using my toilet’ to my maid” (a goal that we later learn was reached when Stephanie wins the award for “Best Conjugator” and informs Martinez that, thanks to him, “Claudia knows now to go before she comes to work.”), and on the other, Martinez discussing the importance of learning Spanish: “Did you know that the U.S. Census believes that by 2030 the majority of Americans will use Spanish as their first language? You’re not here to learn a language, you’re here because you’re smart and you’re forward thinkers.”

    Normally, such juxtaposition is easily detectable and viewers can quickly pick up on the lesson being taught, but the problem with Tuesday night’s episode was that — due in large part to Glee’s patented ironic irreverence and reverse-offensiveness — the message was consistently muddled. It was unclear if Martinez’s refusal to comment on Sra. Stephanie’s condescension was because it was so in-your-face or because … I don’t know what. Same goes for the male Glee members’ decision to perform their mash-up of the Gipsy King’s “Bamboleo” and Enrique Iglesias’ “Hero” in bolo ties and botas picudas — fashion items that have essentially nothing to do with the artists being covered.

    This is not to say that the writers made no attempt at conveying a direct idea. They did.

    After Schuester took the stage in full torero regalia — along with two students that ran back and forth across the stage dressed as bulls — and danced and sang his way through a half-English, half-Spanish version of Elvis’ “A Little Less Conversation,” Santana delivered a passionate missive.
    This is my education and it’s not a joke to me, although it seems to be one to you … [The students] don’t know any better and it’s your fault, you’re their teacher. You went from “La Cucaracha” to a bull-fighting mariachi. Why don’t you just dress up as the Taco Bell chihuahua and bark the theme song to Dora the Explorer? You don’t even know enough to be embarrassed about these stereotypes that you’re perpetuating.
    Santana spoke the words on many viewers’ lips (a friend of mine texted during the Elvis cover asking: “Is blackface coming next?”), elucidating how even the most innocuous ignorance can be harmful. It was a moment of clarity in an otherwise bewildering episode.

    Yet, that was all it was, a moment. The episode swiftly melted back into a puzzling sea of misused duende references and one forced “American dream” anecdote. Though it definitely fell short of being offensive, the entire viewing experience was uncomfortable and, at the very least, strange.

    It’s unfortunate that the episode was so perplexing and distracting, as the musical portion was generally quite good. Martin performed admirably in his first acting gig since his soap opera heyday, and he and Rivera’s sleek and sexy rendition of Madonna’s “La Isla Bonita” was definitely the highlight of the night.

    In one of the episode’s final scenes, Shuester offers Martinez his position as Spanish teacher, setting the stage for a few more guest appearances by Martin. And with Gloria Estefan set to join the cast later this season (she’ll play Santana’s mother), the Glee faithful are guaranteed a few more Latino-infused episodes. I just hope that the next time around, I am left bobbing my head to the music instead of scratching it in confusion.
    ---
    Miguel Tamayo is the Chief Writer at Univision News. A member of the Florida Bar Association, his writing focuses mainly on sports, pop culture, and law. You can follow Miguel on Twitter at @miggytamayo.

    Chinese Fire Drills

    There was something really dumb that I am sure a lot of us did when we were young immature teens when we subconsciously thought we were invincible. Just to show random strangers how crazy and spontaneous you were, and to get a rush of adrenaline, as you approached a red light you would suddenly yell "Chinese Fire Drill". It didn't matter who called it, everyone was forced to participate in this sudden race. Even if you didn't want to, but someone else threw their car door  open and started to run to your side you had to immediately partake or the light would turn green and you'd block the intersection. Suddenly you were driving someone else's car or sitting in someone else's seat and the car screech's forward so as to not hold up traffic and your heart is racing and everyone's laughing and someone usually yells, 'we're so crazy!' as if it is a sense of accomplishment. 'Yep, I'm so crazy and cool I just ran around the car in a busy intersection and its 10 degrees outside and I almost fell on the ice' isn't that awesome? Never mind the poor grandma in the Buick next to you having heart palpitations thinking your friend in the hoodie was running towards her to rob her.  I'm not sure how this teen tradition came to be. There must be something naturally ingrained in select individuals that seek that rush of adrenaline. Those people are the whistle blowers that start it. Then there is the rest of us that are dumb enough to follow along. Cruz is a whistle blower and I am the idiot, at least it feels that way, and the Chinese Fire Drill is the closest comparison I can think of right now to explain our latest situation.
     Cruz is no respecter of time, schedule, location, or emotion. If he decides it's time for some action, he does it. He has at times left the room, at times snuck up behind me, at times just turned his back and with no provocation he pulls his pants down, rips his diaper off and does one of two things. He either poops on the floor or he pulls a poopy diaper off and gets poop all over himself and the floor. Its hard to explain the initial reaction that I have. In the beginning, a few months ago, we thought, 'oh little Cruzie doesn't know what he's doing. Maybe he's just trying to start potty training and doesn't know how to do it.' That was 189 times ago. If he didn't know the first 17 times that it was wrong, he learned quickly. He has been able to pee in the potty on occasion with assistance and has done it at school but hasn't mastered it yet. I just kept questioning myself on how to train him correctly, how to teach him about how we use the toilet (or just keep the diaper on). One day I was getting ready to run errands and leave him with a nanny, who he loves, and he told me 'no'. I gently affirmed that mommy would be home really soon but I had to leave for a little bit. He proceeded to rip his diaper off with eyebrows raised. In his own right, minus words, he was challenging me. He might as well have raised a fist, or blown a whistle. In that moment I knew that this little weasel had been trying to manipulate me the whole time. Just Thursday morning it happened right as we were about to head out the door. The bus would be here to pick him up for school in 5 minutes and what happens? He poops, rips the diaper off, smears it across the rug on his floor and then calls, 'mommy'. Like an early valentine present he stands proudly over his steaming gift of love that he expressly gives me almost every day now. Not a hint on his little face indicting remorse or guilt. Not the slightest hesitation in calling mommy to come see his work. Like his abstract painting just got invited to The Louvre. Beaming from ear to ear and he swayed back and forth waiting to see my response. Thus, everything comes to a screeching halt, as I know that the timer has started. There is but only a few moments to get his body cleaned up, keep Wren and Franklin away from it, get the poop cleaned up, redress him and have him outside waiting for the bus. This morning before church Cruz completely undressed himself from head to toe, removed diaper, and peed on the carpet. This afternoon he went into our bedroom and pooped all over the hardwood floor. I'm talking in the cracks and crevices, smeared on a sham that was on the ground, everywhere. It was everywhere, all over him and any item within a 2 step radius. The imaginary siren sounds and like a cartoon on a submarine its 'ALL HANDS ON DECK'. Jason peeled his shirt off (it was the only article of clothing left on him) and threw him in the shower, I ran and got the paper towels and cleaning supplies. Wren sat up on mommies bed watching wide eyed and repeatedly saying, 'uh oh' and 'oh no'. Franklin had to get in the mix and between running back and forth to the trash, kids in and out of the way, in all the chaos, we are just baffled why he keeps doing this. He was spanked and then placed in the quiet corner for time out and wasn't allowed to talk or move during that time. We are literally baffled. Today had been a great day, time spent together as a family, a great lunch and he even got to have a piece of cake... it was stacking up as a pretty awesome day for a three year old. Again, we find ourselves plunged into panic mode by the simple direction of a 29 pound, skinny as a rail, bobble headed little boy. (I say that because his weight is in the 10% percentile and his head is in the 95th% for kids his age) We don't want to play his games, we don't want to stop what we are in the middle of what we are doing, and we definitely don't want to miss the bus or any other event we are headed to. Until we can resolve this problem, we stand ready for the call of duty for the next time he decides he's ready to blow the whistle.
    Well, thanks to a suggestion, we are trying something new tonight. Jason used duct tape around the diaper. Maybe now he will learn he has to tell us if he wants his diaper changed. 


    Tinikling or 'The Madonna and the Dragon' (1989)








    Tinikling or 'The Madonna and the Dragon' (Samuel Fuller, 1989)
    French Title: Tinikling ou 'La Madonne et le Dragon'

    A film is like a battleground. It’s love, hate, action, violence, death. In one word: emotions,” answered Samuel Fuller when asked by Jean-Paul Belmondo what cinema is in Jean-Luc Godard’s Pierrot le fou (1965). The statement is in fact the guiding principle in most of Fuller’s films, which are fundamentally inspired by all of the things that Fuller has mentioned pervade a war. His masterpieces like Pickup on South Street (1953), Shock Corridor (1963), The Big Red One (1980), and White Dog (1982) are films that are charged with the rawest of those emotions, unhindered by any pretense of subtlety. Even in the twilight of his colorful career, a period which critics have disregarded as his weakest, Fuller still made films that move and stagger like emotional soldiers in the heat of victory or defeat.

    Tinikling or ‘The Madonna and the Dragon’, made for French television and shot entirely in the Philippines, is the last film Fuller directed. The film starts with the display of several photographs of domestic strife from various parts of the world like Beirut and Nicaragua. After which, photographs of Ninoy Aquino’s assassination, leading to the declaration of the elections between overstaying president Ferdinand Marcos and Aquino’s widow, Corazon. The film, set a few days prior to the elections, has foreign journalist photographers chasing around Manila for that perfect picture that will catapult Manila’s chaotic situation to international standards. It pits the distance from their subjects these journalists have to acquire to succeed with the very human situations that they are forced to witness and only document.

    The action begins in the middle of a trash dump. Fuller opens with an extreme close-up of the withered face of an old man who is frantically praying. The camera pans to reveal the barrel of an automatic rifle, sticking against the back of the old man. The rifle’s owner, an intoxicated soldier, orders another person to shoot him at the count of three. The other person, a female photographer named Patty (Jennifer Beals), is cursing the soldier for his inhumanity while readying her camera to shoot the soldier at the exact moment of the old man’s execution. The soldier counts to three, kills the old man, and angrily asks Patty if he shot his proud moment. Patty curses the soldier and says that she couldn’t, forcing the soldier to angrily point his rifle at her, readying to shoot. Before the soldier could pull the trigger, he is shot by another photographer from behind. Simon (Luc Merenda), Patty’s savior at that time is also her ex-husband.

    The opening sequence is one that fulfils Fuller’s description of what cinema is. In a matter of a few minutes, Fuller was able to completely characterize Patty as a woman too concerned over the welfare of her subjects to be truly successful. Simon, on the other hand, is more of a mercenary, adept not only in photography but also in other skills that would land him the perfect sensational photo. The photograph he takes later on, a photograph featuring a soldier shooting an old lady who refuses to reveal the lair of the rebel vigilante group of Mindanao (Ben Cervantes), becomes the object of the film’s story.

    Wanted by Marcos’ men and Mindanao’s men for political reasons because its raw power which can steer the election towards Corazon Aquino and by the foreign press because it encapsulates the situation of the Philippines under the regime of Marcos, the photograph is suddenly stolen, leading Simon and Patty to deal and connive with Manila’s underworld which features Mama (Christa Lang), the shrewd owner of a casino cum brothel, Pavel (Patrick Bauchau), a suspect goon who has ties with both Mama and Mindanao, and a prostitute (Pilar Pilapil) under the care of Mama whose romantic dealings with Mindanao seems to be the picture’s only avenue to a real dramatic heart.

    Tinikling or ‘The Madonna and the Dragon’ is commendable for dealing with a very specific event in Philippine history. Inaccuracies are inevitable. For example, the film makes it seem that Corazon Aquino officially won the elections, leaving out the People Power Revolution which eventually led to Marcos’ ouster. I suppose the several days of the peaceful revolution would throw the film’s quick pace off. I also suppose that Fuller did not have full control over the final product, which is why the film is not as tightly edited as it could be. However, the film has enough Fuller in it to be assessed alongside the director’s best films.

    Aside from the astounding opening, the film also features a gun fight set inside a movie theater. As Mindanao’s men are firing against Marcos’ soldiers, Fuller cuts to the gunfight that is happening in the film being screened. Fuller seems to be channelling his Pierrot le fou quote by juxtaposing the violence of cinema and the violence of the realities of Marcos’ regime in that brilliantly conceived action sequence.

    The film suspiciously ends rationally. Patty finally gets the picture that betrays her earnest characterization, shooting a boy (Reginald Singh), whom Patty rescues from the trash dump from bloodthirsty scavengers early on, who kills a man who turns out to be a Marcos supporter. Simon shoots Patty shooting the picture. Corazon Aquino has replace Marcos as president of the Philippines. Against the man-made peace provided for by a luxurious hotel pool, Patty and Simon are reunited. The boy, whose peculiar grasp of the English language was learned from growing up being fed by gangster movies, is reunited with his passion for rock and roll and everything else American.

    Tinikling or ‘The Madonna and the Dragon’ concludes in a way that everything that happened before, from the extreme poverty that turns children into ingenious murderers to the treachery of freedom fighters, seems to be nothing more than plot points in a continuing history of a nation. From the perspective of foreign eyes, it seems that the very real atrocities of the country are but mere subjects of pulp fiction. Fuller, like the foreign photographers he chose to concentrate on instead of the fractured Filipinos whose stories may prove to be more endearing, chose to tackle his subject from a safe distance, turning the film into an enjoyable, sometimes intellectually stirring but ultimately emotionally shallow trip back to the final days of the Philippines under Marcos’ rule.

    (Cross-published in Lagarista.)

    Love One

    In honor of Valentine's Day I thought I would share this little shuttlecock painting. I completed this painting a few years ago during a summer devoted to playing badminton. That year I discovered a love for the game and for my partner. Somehow I forgot to photograph this piece and had not thought about it since it was painted. I recently met with the owner and was able to get a few shots for my archives and just in time for Valentine's Day.

    Chronicle (2012)








    The Man with a Camera
    A Review of Josh Trank's Chronicle

    Perhaps the only thing that made true sense in all of Michael Bay’s ridiculously noisy Transformers films is a scene in the first film. The homeless robots from outer space have just landed in America, transforming into various vehicles, creating much mayhem, destruction, and fanfare. Instead of running for their lives like the adorably naïve city-dwellers of those cheap monster movies from the 50’s and 60’s, the city-dwellers of Bay’s explosion extravaganza, armed with only video-capable cellular phones or other kinds of portable cameras, go near the metal-bound extraterrestrials and commit the strange occurrences to this world’s technology-aided memory, as captured in bits of data and shared to the world through the help of the internet. That scene in Transformers, perhaps done not for depth but for shallow social satire, sets the film within contemporary terms. It is what differentiates Bay’s films from the outdated but hugely enjoyable and undoubtedly memorable cartoon series from which the films were based.

    Josh Trank’s Chronicle is ostensibly a superhero movie. Three friends discover a hole in the ground with some mysterious contraption that gives them telekinetic abilities. From simple tricks they display amongst themselves, they start expanding their powers, and as their powers evolve, the limits of what their morals can take are tested. They are after all quite suddenly gods among normal men.

    Chronicle’s storyline is by itself satisfying enough to merit the film some attention. The connivance of the troubled coming-of-age of bullied high schoolers and superpowers creates an experience that delightfully betrays comic book expectations. Although many of the film’s plot points are more corny than compelling, the film admirably commits to its nonsensical musings, weaving together characters that are as obnoxious or as likeable as any other person off your Facebook friends list with a plot straight out of Marvel fan-made fiction.

    What ultimately separates Chronicle from other superhero films with the same normal-person-turned-superhero core is the gimmick that pervades the film. The film starts off as a home video. Andrew (Dane DeHaan) has just purchased a cheap camera and has decided to shoot everything that happens in his life. From that logic, the film is allowed to maintain the amateur videographer aesthetic, creating an atmosphere that forces you to understand the motivations behind Andrew’s drastic decisions in the future.

    Interestingly, as the characters gain their telekinetic abilities, and as the cheap camera is replaced with a new and more expensive one, the film also transforms into something sleeker, with deliberate pans and zooms and interesting angles, that not only adds aesthetic variance to this so-called “found footage” film but also adds personality to the character who is supposedly controlling the camera that is capturing the action. In a way, the character is not only described through the actions we immediately see but also through the motivations we impute behind his always wanting to be filmed or chronicled.

    Andrew, from the loner whose only communication with the world is through the videoclips that people someday might see, is transformed into a power-hungry megalomaniac whose zest for self-iconography can only be matched by history’s worst dictators. In one scene that is similar to the Transformers scene earlier mentioned, tourists in the viewing deck of Seattle’s Space Needle start chronicling the midair battle between Andrew and his cousin (Alex Russell) instead of running for safety, Andrew telekinetically grabs the cellular phones and cameras from the onlookers and creates a wall of cameras circling him, capturing his every movement in numerous angles.

    Many critics find the film’s reliance on the so-called found footage as more damning than helpful. I disagree. Perhaps the only liability that Chronicle’s peculiar style deals is that it raises questions as to the consistency of the gimmickry. It just seems unlikely that a camera would be available just anywhere to coherently form a story in motion picture form.

    However, as can only be gleaned from the near limitless videos available online, from the freak accidents in an obscure part of the world that have suddenly gone viral in social networking sites or the proliferation of very personal and intimate video blogs, there is always a possibility, one that could not have existed years before the citizens of the world did not have the ability to randomly pull out a camera to capture robots landing from outer space, of an outrageous story being told by anybody who has unlimited access to view and edit something out of all the videos produced and being produced by the billions of people who have access to cameras. Chronicle is only a Hollywood-ized expression of that fantastical possibility.

    (Cross-published in Lagarista.)

    Gamer (2012)








    Through the Computer Monitor and Back
    A Review of Oleg Sentsov's Gaamer (Gamer)

    You are alone. Everything you see is strange, definitely not of the world where you were born and raised. Your forearms and your hands, the only parts of your body you can see, are curiously muscular, wrapped in space age protection, and brandishing a rifle-like mechanism. You run into a corridor. Running is easy, so you attempt to jump, as soon as the corridor ends to reveal an empty space. The world you’re in definitely does not follow Earth gravity, since your jump was higher than normal. You land straight in the middle of the space.

    Your few seconds of peculiar inactivity in the middle of the empty space is interrupted by a quick yet ominous buzzing sound. You got hit. It didn’t hurt but the red gauge floating on the upper left corner of your field of vision shows that it had a significant damage to your life. You turn around and see the perpetrator, wearing a purple suit of futuristic armor, charging towards you. You fire your weapon, and after moments of sparks and noise, body parts erupt from where your opponent used to be. You let out a sigh of relief. A few seconds later however, the familiar ominous buzzing sound makes another appearance. You got hit again, and as always, it did not hurt. The only difference now is that that is the last time you’ll ever get hit, at least during that insignificant painless life that only lasted for a minute and a few seconds.

    Videogames have really changed. From the pixelated single player adventures that had definite storylines to finish, games are now designed to be immersive and addictive, complete with manufactured visuals that are close to reality and a certain capacity for socialization. Videogames have not only created worlds, they have created lives that are as replaceable as ammo, leading to world rules that do away with morality and the sanctity of things that are normally sacred in the real world. Videogames have allowed us to live second lives that are presided over by the very simple law of kill or be killed. However, these secret second lives, lived only inside wired bedrooms or paid game hubs, are but mutations of the uneventful and painful real lives that gave way to them. The distances between these lives are short. But to travel back and forth, unmindful of the repercussions of being sucked into the seductive delights of a life with hardly any rules and complexities, poses an inherent danger.

    Oleg Sentsov’s Gaamer explores the gap between these two lives. Through the story of young Koss (Vladislav Zhuk), who has just been expelled from vocation school but is unaffected because he believes he has a future in gaming, Sentsov paints a portrait of a very mundane life that struggles for some sort of significance. The nameless Ukrainian town that finds itself as the setting for Koss’ unremarkable coming-of-age offers no opportunity for excitement. The commuter tram plies its daily route with the same ticket lady inspecting if each passenger has paid their fare. The youth are on the verge of crossing over to adulthood, choosing which particular path would lead them to satisfy their responsibilities with the most ease. Most of them talk about college or work or fulfilling an ambition leftover from an unaccomplished childhood. They wilt away, thawing towards university, or some hobby, or some vocation. All in all, it is a town that aspires for character. Its residents, as a result, can only long to escape from that lifelong boredom.

    The pleasures gaming has provided Koss are countless. In his troop, he is a leader, wise in all aspects related to Quake. In the gaming world he thrives in, he is near invincible, allowing him to travel from his town to the capital to win the nationals, paving his way to compete in California along with other anonymous gamers from around the world whose possible dull lives tempt them to do better in their artificial second lives. Those pleasures, like the artificial lives that end as soon as enough hits are absorbed, are temporary. The excitement wears off. The redundancy of real life beckons. Koss has to abandon the fantasies his dissipating childhood has left to live a life that is unadorned and ordinary. Gaamer, in demystifying that particular subculture that has successfully separated generations by exquisitely pointing out the obvious sheens and motivations of those stuck commuting to the game world from the real world, exposes the need for escapism especially from the droll experiences most of humanity is forced to swallow.

    In the end, even cinema is an escape. It has to be exposed for what it is. Its portrayals of truths and half-truths should be placed in a perspective of fiction, of being created by another human being. When Koss has readied to graduate from being a gamer to become an adult, he sheds his jacket and prepares to sleep. A celebratory song plays in the background, and Koss, from being melancholic in his delayed decision to grow up, beams a smile, and looks at us. The same way that he broke the barrier that separates videogames from real life, Sentsov breaks the barrier that separates cinema from real life. By revealing the artificiality of his creative exercise, he deepens his agenda, cautioning the world from being too enchanted with second, third, and fourth lives lived vicariously through avatars that are either controlled from a mouse and keyboard or directed by intellectuals behind the camera.

    (First published in Filmkrant: Slow Criticism 2012.)